The basic laws of attraction for men who are not the best looking in the room is to "fake it 'till you make it". If you (as a guy) feels like trying to chat to a female is going to be a waste of time because you are not attractive enough, then guess what? You will come across as a loser and yes, it will be a waste of time. Chicks can sense when a guy has no self-confidence so by behaving in a confident manner (essentially pretending to be on your game) you can fool her long enough for her to get to know you a bit and you can learn to relax around females.
Okay so first things first. Kick that loser out of your head and just relax. It's just a woman after all. Stand up straight and be friendly and smile. Don't sweat it if she brushes you off, seriously. It's all an experiment anyway, right? So see how far into a conversation you can get with a woman before she loses interest, IF she loses interest. This is all about the learning curve, so it doesn't matter if the first woman you talk to blows you off. Just try again.
Why do you automatically presume that she is better than you, or even a nice person at all? Go over there and just be curious to find out more about the person you have in front of you. Don't base your self-esteem on the reaction women have to you in clubs, they don't know you at all! When an interaction happens, it could be that you will not get the response you were hoping for, but maybe you have learned something new about yourself, about women or about male-female interaction on the whole.
As mentioned before, women have this built in B.S. detector, so they can smell anxiety on a guy like bad B.O. By ignoring the fact that she may or may not brush you off should help you relax, but remembering that she's just another chick and you can talk to another and another, also helps. This doesn't mean you must devalue anything they say now or treat them with disrespect. This will earn you a kick in the teeth, but just try to be calm and your own natural self, and women will be more receptive to you.
Once again, and this is actually important, do not attempt to engage in conversation with a woman by doing the boring chit chat thing. Steer clear of topics like weather, sport, the news, religion and definitely sex and exes. Not only will this be the equivalent of a dash of ice water down her back, but also a complete shutdown emotionally on her part, with zero success at resuscitation on your part. If possible, quietly, and unobtrusively, listen to her talking to her fiends if she has any around at the function, party, whatever. Listen and learn about what women talk about and really get passionate about (emotion again) when talking amongst themselves, will give you an edge and the perfect way to actually get in there and talk to her without feeling like a complete moron. This will more than likely open the door for you to ask for her number, and get it!
The minute you have her phone number you basically have at least a couple of dates in the bag if you have a good texting technique. The secret to good texting is avoiding the most common pitfalls. First of all, don't come on too strong or you will freak her out. What you think is sexy she might find just plain creepy so be careful.
Avoid at all costs being banished to the friend zone by stupidly behaving like a love-sick puppy and being needy. No woman wants a puppy for a boyfriend, let alone a lover! Be emotionally available for her, when it's appropriate, but be a man too! You want to get her heart racing and her body hot, not get her giggling and making baby talk because you think being emotionally available is to be a sweet, clingy pup who is in constant need of attention. Women want a strong confident man, not an overly soft, best friend type male best friend. Definitely not sexy.
Try not to text more than once a day and don't be overly diligent in answering her. Women will try to see if they can control you and if they discover they can you will lose ground. Rather have her upset at you because you haven't answered her latest text message than give her the feeling that she can control your life. If you send her a message and she doesn't answer, do not send her another message later in the day. There is nothing worse than sending her silly and boring messages by the dozen!
Another thing you certainly want to avoid is being known as the clown. Don't try and be cute and funny by sending her a bunch of cute and/or funny texts, unless they really ARE cute/funny, and appropriate. This will depend on where you are in the relationship.
So be kind and have a sense of self-worth, follow our interaction and texting guidelines and you will soon have your phone ringing and women asking you out!
Okay so first things first. Kick that loser out of your head and just relax. It's just a woman after all. Stand up straight and be friendly and smile. Don't sweat it if she brushes you off, seriously. It's all an experiment anyway, right? So see how far into a conversation you can get with a woman before she loses interest, IF she loses interest. This is all about the learning curve, so it doesn't matter if the first woman you talk to blows you off. Just try again.
Why do you automatically presume that she is better than you, or even a nice person at all? Go over there and just be curious to find out more about the person you have in front of you. Don't base your self-esteem on the reaction women have to you in clubs, they don't know you at all! When an interaction happens, it could be that you will not get the response you were hoping for, but maybe you have learned something new about yourself, about women or about male-female interaction on the whole.
As mentioned before, women have this built in B.S. detector, so they can smell anxiety on a guy like bad B.O. By ignoring the fact that she may or may not brush you off should help you relax, but remembering that she's just another chick and you can talk to another and another, also helps. This doesn't mean you must devalue anything they say now or treat them with disrespect. This will earn you a kick in the teeth, but just try to be calm and your own natural self, and women will be more receptive to you.
Once again, and this is actually important, do not attempt to engage in conversation with a woman by doing the boring chit chat thing. Steer clear of topics like weather, sport, the news, religion and definitely sex and exes. Not only will this be the equivalent of a dash of ice water down her back, but also a complete shutdown emotionally on her part, with zero success at resuscitation on your part. If possible, quietly, and unobtrusively, listen to her talking to her fiends if she has any around at the function, party, whatever. Listen and learn about what women talk about and really get passionate about (emotion again) when talking amongst themselves, will give you an edge and the perfect way to actually get in there and talk to her without feeling like a complete moron. This will more than likely open the door for you to ask for her number, and get it!
The minute you have her phone number you basically have at least a couple of dates in the bag if you have a good texting technique. The secret to good texting is avoiding the most common pitfalls. First of all, don't come on too strong or you will freak her out. What you think is sexy she might find just plain creepy so be careful.
Avoid at all costs being banished to the friend zone by stupidly behaving like a love-sick puppy and being needy. No woman wants a puppy for a boyfriend, let alone a lover! Be emotionally available for her, when it's appropriate, but be a man too! You want to get her heart racing and her body hot, not get her giggling and making baby talk because you think being emotionally available is to be a sweet, clingy pup who is in constant need of attention. Women want a strong confident man, not an overly soft, best friend type male best friend. Definitely not sexy.
Try not to text more than once a day and don't be overly diligent in answering her. Women will try to see if they can control you and if they discover they can you will lose ground. Rather have her upset at you because you haven't answered her latest text message than give her the feeling that she can control your life. If you send her a message and she doesn't answer, do not send her another message later in the day. There is nothing worse than sending her silly and boring messages by the dozen!
Another thing you certainly want to avoid is being known as the clown. Don't try and be cute and funny by sending her a bunch of cute and/or funny texts, unless they really ARE cute/funny, and appropriate. This will depend on where you are in the relationship.
So be kind and have a sense of self-worth, follow our interaction and texting guidelines and you will soon have your phone ringing and women asking you out!
About the Author:
We're a completely third party and independent evaluation site that has researched the positives and negatives of txt messaging designed for dating. For our evaluation on the Magnetic Messaging book come to our web-site; http://magneticmessagingreviewer.com
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