You can have a civil ceremony in lieu of a religious one, or you can have both. In essence, a civil officer witnesses the marriage commitment after the requisite paperwork has been completed. This varies state to state but certain legalities will inevitably apply. It is tradition for the best man to pay.
First, finalize whether the ceremony should be religious or civil. If the ceremony is to be religious, you will need an ordained minister. These persons are not only certified by the state but also by a religious organization as well. If the ceremony is civil, it can be performed by whoever is certified in accordance with state laws.
The person you select must be recognized by your state and hold proper certification. It is presumed that a minister will be part of a known denomination. As long as you check ahead, you can't go wrong. If you use referrals, or someone you know, your chances of a beautiful outcome are all but assured. Your wedding planner may also have a suggestion if you get in a bind.
The bride and groom may attend sessions at the officiant's church or with him or her personally. They may discuss marital matters and what to expect. The ceremony officiant is a key person at the rehearsal and sets the tone for the upcoming day. You can invite your minister by phone or invitation: it's entirely up to you how formal or casual you want the relationship to be.
You should already have discussed the basic approach to the ceremony and have accepted it as such. The celebrant must be in tune with the couple's own thinking. Officiants are usually open to making customized changes to please the bride and groom.
They want it to be a meaningful ceremony over all. It can be solemn or light-hearted according to the couple's conception of their nuptials. Both are equally valid. Many couples write their own vows as officiants well know.
The fee is to be considered and not something to hide under the rug. Negotiate it beforehand to avoid embarrassment. You can pay before or after as the person advises. You are agreeing to certain terms, almost like a contract, and it is a business transaction. A religious figure may want a donation to his or her congregation, and it is not unexpected. There may be other cost factors such as transportation and lodging.
The budget for the minister will depend on the state. It is always better to clear this with the minister because paying for this may bloat the budget. As a tradition, the best man will personally cover the ceremony.
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